So it's not true. I'm not really a masochist after all. I definitely love research and actually want to be doing it a lot of the time... but I am gradually learning how to be a bit more realistic. I've always been a bit of an 'eyes are bigger than my stomach' sort of person. I love life and I get excited about my next steps and what I want to do. So inevitably at the beginning of a new year or new semester I start with very high hopes and then feeling quite embarrassed change track just before the census date when I realise I've done it again.
I've decided to drop back to one subject this semester which means no PhD next year as I won't have finished my masters. Even though it seems ridiculously obvious in hindsight, this was a really hard decision for me to make.
I considered deleting this blog. It doesn't seem such a good beginning to publicly declare my goals then back down from them within the first few posts. But my decision is still based on doing my best to establish a research career and I can learn from this that if I'm establishing a research career for 'me' then I need to do it my way... take my time to finish my masters if I need it.
The bonus for me of this change is that I will have a bit more time to focus on learning how to get work published and explore the topic I'm considering focusing on in my minor thesis.
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